Ep. 21 | Xavier Dagba: How Your Mother & Father Wounds Hijack Your Purpose & mission
JOIN THE RETREAT (this Saturday):
UPROOTING THE RELATIONAL SHADOWS THAT HIJACK YOUR MISSION: THE RETREAT
➡️ Live Saturday, December 13th — Replay Included
https://www.xavierdagba.com/retreat
ABOUT THIS EPISODE — How Your Mother & Father Wounds Hijack Your Purpose
In this episode, I explore one of the deepest truths I’ve seen in my own journey and in the lives of every lightworker, creative, and soul-led entrepreneur I’ve worked with:
Your mission is not being blocked by strategy.
Your purpose is being hijacked by your relational blueprint.
We look at how your mother and father wounds, inner child dynamics, attachment patterns, and the internalized voices of your caregivers shape:
- your ability to be visible,
- your emotional resilience,
- your capacity to lead from the heart,
- your relationship with responsibility,
- your ability to receive support and abundance,
- your confidence in shining your light,
- and your willingness to take up space.
We also explore the toxic mix of the inner child + inner critic that quietly sabotages creativity, leadership, and self-expression, especially for lightworkers and mission-led leaders.
And because holiday season relational patterns are activating right now, this episode is also a guide to stay sovereign rather than spiraling into old dynamics.
If you’ve ever wondered why you can KNOW your purpose but still feel unable to live it, this episode will give you the map.
ORDER MY BOOK — Scars of Gold
Until Saturday, December 13th, the eBook is only $2.99 on most online retailers:
Amazon Kindle, Apple Books, Barnes & Noble, Kobo, and more.
Claim your bonuses here when you register your order:
https://www.scarsofgold.com
LISTEN TO THE ENHEARTENED PODCAST
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6sxXNMfsN9FnK34glRnkFC
Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/enheartened-with-xavier-dagba/id1798866363
If this resonates, subscribe, leave a review & share the episode with someone who needs this.
CHAPTERS
00:00 – Why you’re not stuck: the hidden relational imprint
01:20 – Strategy isn’t the issue — inner fragmentation is
03:00 – The holiday activation window & why this work matters now
04:10 – You learned to abandon your light in relationships
06:00 – The core fears behind self-expression
07:15 – Childhood fragmentation & staying attached
09:05 – Mapping the inner archetypes (Mother, Father, Child, Critic)
11:30 – When the inner critic becomes spiritualized
13:05 – Inner mother distortions: overgiving, collapsing boundaries
15:00 – Inner father distortions: visibility, authority & decisiveness
17:00 – When the inner child runs your mission
19:00 – Becoming the leader your light deserves
20:30 – Personal story: relational patterns surfacing during your book launch
22:00 – Recognizing ancestral patterns & internalized narratives
25:00 – Purpose as a trauma bond: the anxious attachment to your mission
27:15 – Why the holidays amplify relational wounds
29:00 – Personal story: leaving your PhD & early father imprints
33:00 – Breaking the inherited template in 2018
36:00 – 2026: The year of sovereign leadership
38:10 – What the retreat will help you reclaim
39:05 – Closing invitation & gratitude
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